Day 12: Who's Set is it Anyway? 4/14/07

I have had yet to do a guest set and Julie said I could show up at the Mainstage anytime they have a headliner, so why not give it a shot? I texted Julie to see if there were any spots available to which she replied "yup". There were two sets tonight and I was going to see if I could hit up both, but then a buddy asked if I wanted to see a movie so I skipped the first show. I texted Julie to let her know I'd come in for the second show. After the movie I got a text message from her "we're taping the 8 o'clock show".

FUCKSHITPISS!!!

I forgot that she mentioned she was taping it for records and a show. I got there around 9 which was an hour into that show, the headliner however was going to do some improv with the other comics so I jumped in. There was a bunch of us up there and Ron Osborne (the headliner) asked the audience to name a product and we were to come up with the worst slogan for it. I did one or two that were OK but not amazing. Fun times though.

The 2nd show started and I was going to be the first guest set. I was going to bring out my 80s bit because I haven't worked it in awhile. I watched Justin (the host) do his opening and the crowd was tough. I was pumped up because I had an energy drink right before I went up... bad idea. When I got onto stage I was trying to rev up the crowd and they were barely having it. I went into an abbreviated cocaine bit which they were into (shocker), and then the 80s bit. My brain was buzzing from the caffeine so I ended up dropping one bit all together and fucking up the punch line of another. My closer for 80s bit went well though... not a bad set, but it was rough going.

When Ron Osborne went up again he was having a hard time with the audience. You could tell he had a lot of good tricks up his sleeve for such occasions (I'm realizing how much you need them as a comedian) but they were hit and miss. He was really funny from where I was standing though. He brought us up again for some improv. This time he asked the audience to name a profession and we had to act out the worst employer for it. Someone called out hooker and I went up to the microphone and pretended to cry while I pulled my zipper down. My other glory moment was when someone said "sewer worker" and I walked up to the mic and did a sassy gay voice and said "This place is a fucking MESS!" The crowning moment came from Travis Simmons when we did the product slogans again and some one yelled "Tampon" and he said "Now with real lemon juice".

I hung out afterwards with the people working in the VIP room and shot the shit with them. Susan who books a couple of clubs offered for me and Justin to split a feature set (Remember: Headliner=45 min, Feature=30 min, Guest=5 min, and Host=7min+bringing up the comics) giving us 15 minutes apiece. Nice, but I'm going to be busy directing a show for awhile so I don't know when I'll be able to do it. Later I mentioned to Susan that I grew up in Medford,OR and she mentioned that she books for Ground Zero, a club in Medford.

AAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!

Me performing in Medford. Hell yeah. I'm going to see if I can make that happen by the end of Summer. That would be fucking fantastic. Oh God, so many conspiracies running around in my brain. Holy Shit I love it.

Lesson: Improv is a great tool for comedy. It keeps you thinking on your feet. Do it more often.

Back up lesson: Maybe energy drinks before your set is not such a good idea.